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Who: Link and his thoughts
Where: In his room in the castle
When: First day of Fall (9/22)
What: Unhappy preteen
There was something wrong with him.
Link knew that. He knew there was something off about him, that made reading and writing such a misery. He couldn't even gleam any happiness from it knowing he was making someone else happy, because, there was no end to it. Just another book to slog and stumble through. And no one ever seemed happy with his efforts.
He hated it so much. He hated that he hated it. Just another way in which he was forever different from everyone else, didn't fit in like he was supposed to. Link wished he could lie, just smile and say he loved it, so they'd stop pushing it on him. Because, it was another case of him being on the outside looking in, and it was a miserable feeling. Even worse, he was disappointing the people he cared about most.
Maybe he should just stop trying to share the things he liked, just to be fair. He'd stop offering to share the bowling alley, he'd stop asking people to go fishing--maybe those things made other people as sad and miserable as reading made him.
Maybe...maybe that was what people really wanted? For him to just leave them alone? And that's why they were pushing the lonely hobby of reading onto him? Well, Link could certainly do his hobbies by himself. If that was the problem, he would stop bothering them with his ideas of fun.
Or...maybe...he really did have to be perfect. He'd begged to know what he had to do to be considered "good enough" only to be told there was no such thing. Which meant he had to be perfect. No mistakes. No failings. If that was true, then....well, there was no point in even trying any more. Link wasn't perfect, and he knew it. He was a kid, and not even a normal one.
"I'm stupid, Eldin." He told his cat, flopping down on his bottom bunk. The orange Persian, opened one golden eye and yawned.
"I don't read or write fancy enough. If I get through a lesson, there's just a more harder one waiting, every single time. And I don't know what to do. If I quit, Clef'll be upset. If I keep doing what I'm doing, I'm going to lose my mind. What's the right thing to do?"
Eldin stretched and walked over to curl up on the boy's chest, purring.
"If I lie, that's not right, but, if I did a good job of it, people would be happy thinking I liked the stuff."
Link stroked Eldin's soft ears. "If I quit, Clef'll be upset and maybe he'd kick me out, or just ignore me for a solid year or something...."
"But, if I keep doing what I'm doing, I think I'm gonna crack." He let his hand drop over the side of the bed and sighed. "I can't be perfect. I'm just...not."
Staring at the bottom of the top bunk, Link mused, "Is it...super selfish of me to wish that saving two worlds counted for something? Maybe gave me a pass that, y'know, he might suck at reading and his spelling is goddessawful, but, gosh, he's good at saving lives?"
He tucked his arms behind his head and chewed his lip.
"I miss Navi."
Where: In his room in the castle
When: First day of Fall (9/22)
What: Unhappy preteen
There was something wrong with him.
Link knew that. He knew there was something off about him, that made reading and writing such a misery. He couldn't even gleam any happiness from it knowing he was making someone else happy, because, there was no end to it. Just another book to slog and stumble through. And no one ever seemed happy with his efforts.
He hated it so much. He hated that he hated it. Just another way in which he was forever different from everyone else, didn't fit in like he was supposed to. Link wished he could lie, just smile and say he loved it, so they'd stop pushing it on him. Because, it was another case of him being on the outside looking in, and it was a miserable feeling. Even worse, he was disappointing the people he cared about most.
Maybe he should just stop trying to share the things he liked, just to be fair. He'd stop offering to share the bowling alley, he'd stop asking people to go fishing--maybe those things made other people as sad and miserable as reading made him.
Maybe...maybe that was what people really wanted? For him to just leave them alone? And that's why they were pushing the lonely hobby of reading onto him? Well, Link could certainly do his hobbies by himself. If that was the problem, he would stop bothering them with his ideas of fun.
Or...maybe...he really did have to be perfect. He'd begged to know what he had to do to be considered "good enough" only to be told there was no such thing. Which meant he had to be perfect. No mistakes. No failings. If that was true, then....well, there was no point in even trying any more. Link wasn't perfect, and he knew it. He was a kid, and not even a normal one.
"I'm stupid, Eldin." He told his cat, flopping down on his bottom bunk. The orange Persian, opened one golden eye and yawned.
"I don't read or write fancy enough. If I get through a lesson, there's just a more harder one waiting, every single time. And I don't know what to do. If I quit, Clef'll be upset. If I keep doing what I'm doing, I'm going to lose my mind. What's the right thing to do?"
Eldin stretched and walked over to curl up on the boy's chest, purring.
"If I lie, that's not right, but, if I did a good job of it, people would be happy thinking I liked the stuff."
Link stroked Eldin's soft ears. "If I quit, Clef'll be upset and maybe he'd kick me out, or just ignore me for a solid year or something...."
"But, if I keep doing what I'm doing, I think I'm gonna crack." He let his hand drop over the side of the bed and sighed. "I can't be perfect. I'm just...not."
Staring at the bottom of the top bunk, Link mused, "Is it...super selfish of me to wish that saving two worlds counted for something? Maybe gave me a pass that, y'know, he might suck at reading and his spelling is goddessawful, but, gosh, he's good at saving lives?"
He tucked his arms behind his head and chewed his lip.
"I miss Navi."
